|
Child Abuse:
An All Too Pervasive Tragedy
***z-headeradsense.shtml***
Is it child abuse? My Dad once doubled
up his fist and struck me in the head because I forgot to feed the dog;
I responded by picking myself off the ground and opening a can of
Kennel-Ration for an eager and hungry German Shepherd named Hans.
He decked me again a
couple of years later after a conference with my 8th grade teacher.
In addition to receiving grades for academics we were evaluated on
behavioral issues, i.e. punctuality, obedience and courtesy. Few things
in life are as obnoxious a 12-year-old boy, and I was the king of
obnoxious at St. Michael School that year—Sister Agnes Regina
described my behavior to my father in vivid detail.
I was in the field next to our house playing baseball with my little
brother and some friends when Dad returned. He went in the house and
moments later Mom came out, grabbed my brother by the arm and headed
for her car. On the way she turned to me with dread in her eyes; “Your
father wants to see you in the house!”
I walked through the door and he was there to meet me.
“This is for
the way you act!” he said.
For the second time in my life I was knocked to the floor by a fist to
the side of my head. He told me to stand up and I obeyed, preparing for
the next assault.
 “And
this if
for the way you talk!”
He had a handful of Rinso Blue laundry detergent and told me to open my
mouth and eat it. When I tried to spit some of it out he stuffed more
in my mouth and commanded “Eat it!” and I did.
After a bit he led me to the bathroom and allowed me to rinse out my
mouth. When I was finished he told me to go to my bedroom; I could hear
him removing his belt as he followed me. I knew what was coming as a
few swats to the behind was a not-uncommon form of punishment in our
household. I started to take my face-down position on the bed and he
stopped me.
“Take off your
jeans!”
Well now; that was a new
twist on an old standby! But was it abuse?
My stepmother only hit me
once that I can remember.
 It
wasn’t
nearly as hard as my dad’s KO punches but the effect was much
more dramatic; her quick backhand gave me a bloody nose at the dinner
table! Was that
abuse? I’ll attempt to answer both those questions in the
segment titled "Definition
of Child Abuse."
I was probably 11 or 12 years old when the bloody nose incident took
place, But despite her never laying another hand on me she spent the
next 35 years taking every opportunity that presented itself to debase,
degrade, ignore, criticize or otherwise find fault with me.
No scars, no bruises, no
outward signs to indicate the emotional beating I was taking.
I didn’t have a name for her treatment but I’ve
learned that what she did to me was perhaps the cruelest and most
insidious form of abuse. You’ll learn more about this
all-to-common form of mistreatment in the section on "Emotional
Child Abuse."
Abuse comes in many forms. It
can be as subtle as simply not acknowledging a job well done or as
brutal as beating, rape or sexual molestation. But
whatever the form it takes child abuse is a crime committed by
emotionally disabled people; the irony is that in at least 1 in 3 cases
the victim will be emotionally scarred to the point that they too
become abusers. It’s a sad and unsavory topic and frankly,
I’m not sure I see a fix right around the corner. But like so
many human afflictions awareness provides a first step toward
recognition of and subsequent correction of the problem.
I hope that providing
this information will offer some solace
 ...to
the abused among you who read it
and I pray that the psychic wound that resulted from your abuse can
begin healing. It’s not an easy recovery and it’s
often unpleasant. But it can be done and I assure you it’s
worth the pain and effort; trust me, I speak from experience.
I met a kindred spirit on
the Internet and I'd like you to
meet her too. Tina is a webmaster like me, a victim like us,
and I encourage you to visit her site and her the story of her
child abuse.
Go
To Definition of Child Abuse
Go
To Abuse Statistics
Go
To Emotional Abuse
Go
To Psychological Effects of
Abuse
Read
About My Recovery from
Emotional Abuse
Return
Home
|
***z-affiladsright.shtml***
|